CALL CENTER

I’m out on a trail walking the dogs
And
I’m on the phone with American Airlines customer service.
I chose this path when they told me an hour ago they were very busy and would call me back, if I wanted. Not man enough to wait on the phone at home and listen to their music, I agreed.
My problem was not solvable online even though years ago we had all agreed with the airlines to work as our own ticketing agent.
Apparently there was no other way to solve my problem.
The music plays and I ponder their existence along with my own,
As the dogs look around wondering when the actual walk is going to start.
Where are they?
In a vast underground facility headsets and mics at the ready,
Their boss at the head of the room seated at a slightly taller table.
The music plays on.
What is their suicide rate?
Is it like dentists?
I wait.
The music plays on.
What is the suicide rate of AA customers stuck on hold with this music?
This is Severance.
I’m greeted by a happy agent,
Who tells me right away we have the same first name,
I tell him what I want,
He calls me “sir” and scat sings to himself while typing,
Then says, “just one moment”.
Another 30 minutes go by as I alternate listening to music and to this agent asking me questions and then listening to his scat singing while he hits a few keys and says, “just 3 more minutes sir”.
The dogs sniff the grass, pee a little and wrap their leashes around my legs.
Anxious.
Like me.
The agent comes back.
I just need your credit card.
You can’t see my account?
No sir.
The one you got my reservation from in the first place?
No sir.
I give them my card info,
Sharing my details with the neighbors on this little trail I’m on.
That’s it? We’re good?
Yes sir, would you like to apply for an AA credit card
No.
I can connect you with the bank.
No, I just want to walk my dogs.
“Ok, have a nice day,
Hopefully without too much chaos.”